


Swamp Gazebos

by emmisaysmufasa



Category: IT (2017), Shrek (Movies)
Genre: I'm so sorry, M/M, Shrek AU, idk if i'll finish this but, yeah - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-25
Updated: 2017-10-25
Packaged: 2019-01-22 21:50:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 692
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12491600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emmisaysmufasa/pseuds/emmisaysmufasa
Summary: this is a hellfic and i'm so sorry.IT X Shrek AUi warned you :/i didn't create these characters or plotlines either really this is just shrek with the IT characters and in-jokes. just done for fun, no profit, etc.





	Swamp Gazebos

The sun rose over the swamp, and birds flew in the other direction, away from it. A pungent smell arose, and Stan the ogre pushed through the door of his outhouse. He took a mud bath, then brushed his teeth with slugs. He looked in his mirror, and it cracked to pieces.   
Today's plan was the same as any other: go fishing, try to ward off annoying humans, maybe have a cheeky pint. Stan turned to go out to the forest, his favourite place to spend time. 

Ben lowered his head as his owner pulled him through the crowds of noise and busy-ness.   
"Here. This is an enchanted puppet."   
Ben felt sad. He wasn't a puppet- he was a real boy!   
The guard sighed. "Five shillings for the possessed toy."   
As Ben was passed over, he watched all the other fairy tale creatures, heads down as his had been, accepting their doom. Would things always be this way? Would there never be hope?

From behind Ben and his owner, a woman made an impatient noise. "ExCUSE ME!"   
"Yes, ma'am," the guard sighed, clearly wishing he were being paid for this job.   
"Here i have a TALKING donkey!" She said triumphantly.   
The man raised an eyebrow and looked at the donkey. It didn't look like it talked very much.   
"Prove it."  
The woman looked at the donkey desperately. It didn't budge.   
The guard sighed. "Get her out of my sight."  
"HE TALKS!!!" she kept yelling, as she was pulled away. The donkey stepped back and tripped over a rock, then quickly trotted away. But not with the woman. Never again, after this. He turned away from her, and went off into the forest. 

Stan was looking for some mushrooms, when suddenly, a donkey came running into him! �"Hey!" he yelled.   
"FUCK" said the donkey, then it froze as it realised the guards had heard it speak.   
Stan and the donkey looked at each other for a second, then took off. 

When Stan and the donkey had shaken off the guards, and were in a clearing, Stan decided to address the donkey, who hadn't stopped talking the whole way.   
"Do you ever shut up?"  
The donkey shook his head. "Nope!"   
Stan let out an anguished cry. Brilliant.  
"So where abouts are you from anyway? I used to live with this woman- she was not hot, either- and then she tried to sell me. Speaking of selling, what do-"  
"If i answer you will you Shut Up???"  
The donkey nodded.  
"I live in my swamp."  
"Ohh, right that makes sense, because you're an ogre. Ogres and swamps, like donkeys and farms, and puppets and-"  
Stan groaned again. It was something he'd get used to doing around the donkey.  
"By the way, I'm Richie. Richie Tozier is my name, and voices is my game!"  
Stan tried to walk faster.  
"What's your name, anyway?"  
Stan spun around. "Why are you talking to me? I'm a big, scary, ugly ogre! Does that not scare you???"  
Richie shook his head.   
Stan stepped back in surprise. "Oh. Okay..."  
"So what is your name?"  
"Uh... Stan."

Once Stan got to his swamp he was hoping Richie would take the hint and leave, but instead he came trotting in as well.   
"I like that table. You know I had a table back home, just like that- not just like that, it was red, and this one's more of a brown-"  
"GET OUT OF MY SWAMP!" Stan yelled.   
Richie recoiled for a second, then shook it off. "Fine. Can I stay outside, then?"  
Stan sighed and rubbed his eyes. "Fine! I don't want to hear anything, though! You got it?"

At about 12:06, approximately three seconds after that exact time, Stan heard something outside. He stormed over to the window. "What did i say??"  
"It wasn't me!!" Richie insisted, and Stan turned, to see a sight he had never thought he'd see, had hoped he'd never see.  
Hundreds of fairytale creatures, all outside his swamp- though as he turned, some mice were making their way to the door. He picked them up and threw them.   
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY SWAMP??"


End file.
